Friday Thoughts with Lucy

Work, people, change and whatever else has caught my attention this week.

Who are we do decide someone's potential

I've been thinking this week about how easily people can be written off.

Sometimes it's because they've struggled with something. Sometimes they've made mistakes, needed more support than expected or simply haven't followed the path that other people thought they should. And sometimes, once people have formed an opinion about what someone is capable of, it can be remarkably difficult to change their minds.

I've experienced some of this myself over the past few months, and it's made me think about the assumptions we make and the opportunities people can lose when others stop believing in them. But I've also been reminded of something rather wonderful.

My daughter is having her first reading week at university. I'd half expected her to come home for a few days, but she's decided to stay, enjoy the peace and quiet and get ahead with her studies.

She's apparently"feeling like a proper busy student." I can't tell you how much I love that.

Four years ago, at 16, she couldn't leave the house independently. There were times when university, employment and all those ordinary milestones of growing up felt very far away.

This is her second attempt at university. There have been setbacks, difficult periods and a great deal of work behind the scenes to get here. Just this time last year she was about to drop out of her first year on a different course in a different environment. But here she is. Making her own decisions, organising her studies and enjoying her independence. And I can't help wondering what might have happened if we'd accepted her difficulties at 16 (and younger) as a prediction of what her future would look like.

How often do we decide what someone is capable of without giving them the opportunity to show us something different?

It's something I've seen in our work at Inclusive Change, too. We've supported people who have been told, directly or indirectly, that a particular career isn't for them, that they aren't ready for employment or that they simply won't manage. And sometimes, with the right support, a different environment or someone willing to give them an opportunity, they do far more than manage. They thrive.

There's something incredibly rewarding about watching someone begin to recognise their own potential, particularly when they've spent years being told what they can't do. Of course, believing in someone doesn't mean ignoring the difficulties they face. Sometimes those difficulties are significant. Progress isn't always quick, and the right support can take time to work out. But there's a difference between recognising that someone is strugglingright nowand deciding that they will always struggle. And I wonder how often we confuse the two.

We see this in workplaces, education and everyday life. Someone struggles in one role and we assume they won't succeed in another. Someone needs support and we question their independence. Someone has a difficult period and it becomes the thing they're known for. But people change. They learn, develop, adapt and sometimes surprise us in the most wonderful ways. And perhaps one of the most important things we can do, whether we're parents, managers, educators or simply people who care about other people, is to make sure we don't close doors unnecessarily. Because sometimes the person everyone has stopped expecting anything from is the person who has the most to show us.

So that's my thought for this Friday.

Don't write people off just yet. You might be amazed by what happens next.

Have a lovely weekend and Happy Halloween if thats something you celebrate.

Lucy

P.S. I've also been a guest on a podcast recently. The Leadership Multiverse allowed me to talk about one of my favourite films through the lens of leadership. Want to find out what that film is? Go take a listen.

If you fancy a listen over the weekend, here's the link:

Listen to the podcast on Spotify